Ok, so you know those great "you might be a redneck if..." one-liners? (I grew up in PA, people, we read them all the time.) Well, I'm going to do a couple for my pregnancy symptoms. Enjoy. And then write some of your own in the "comment" section at the bottom...
You might be pregnant if...
#10. …you eat a regularly sized meal and 45 min later are ready to have another one.
#9. ...the solution to nausea is to eat something, even though that's the LAST thing it feels like you should do.
#8. ...your nose and your stomach are continually at war. (sinus congestion makes me nauseated and gagging usually induces the need to blow my nose).
#7. ...your husband says you're extra crazy but is afraid to give specific examples...
#6. ...the bra you bought 3 weeks ago is now completely wrong.
#5. …there are some hilarious symptoms that belong on this list but they’re so embarrassing you just can’t bring yourself to publish them on the internet...
#4. ...you open a fresh steak to cook for your husband (who still likes to eat normal things) and the smell of the raw beef is so overwhelmingly delicious you try to justify eating it raw by comparing it to ordering a rare steak at a restaurant, and then get so grossed out at yourself you throw it under the broiler and run out of the kitchen to prevent taking a bite right then.
#3. ...you suddenly find it easier to decide where the line between "moderately annoying" student behavior and "unacceptable and deserving of a detention" is, and start writing detentions with a vengeance.
#2. ...suddenly ultrasound photos are the most beautiful things you've ever seen.
#1. ...you have waves of exhaustion completely unrelated to the amount of activity you've had during the day. (I fell asleep on the toilet a few days ago. what?!?!?!)
How clever! The 'you might be pregnant if...' line is so funny! You should post more of these as you are seeing symptoms surface.
ReplyDeleteI'll have to think about additions to this list, but thought you should know that JoAnn sells bra extenders (look with the velcro and elastic and stuff). You'll still have to buy bras in approximately 47 sizes before this is over, but that at least helps with one aspect of sizing problems!
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